So today the results are out, the ones the world has been waiting for with baited breath. Everybody thought they knew who would win but I don't think ANYBODY saw this coming. That's right, the NME Cool List results are in! Yeah, who gives a fuck, certainly not me. A list of people that are cool? I thought it was cool to not be cool? At least that's the mantra I've lived my life by, hence my effortlessness appearance and love of trashy pop. Why am I not on the cool list you may ask? Because I am so uncool, that I'm too cool to be on the list and am therefore not cool again. Honestly, the cool list makes about as much sense as that.

Don't get me wrong, Crystal Castles are a great band, Alex Turner is cool and fair play to Jay-Z I guess, but to me this reads liek a lsit of the frontmen and women of NME's new favourite bands and that's about it. Nobody genuinely cool, like Tom Waits for returning to the live scene in such style. Or James Ford for his incredible work with Klaxons, SMD and every other band worth chatting about. There were always going to be obvious ommisions but really.

So as we draw ever closer to a vote that does actually mean something, browse the list of who's cool this year and find your new favourite haircut/jeans/eye shadow colour.